[Professional Blog] Ladies and gentleman ... Great Big Steve

Been thinking about starting a tribute band to mark Great Big Sea's 20th anniversary next year.

It'd be called Great Big Steve, and would parody their music with a Weird Al-like spin.

Like "End of Da Pearl (The Amalgamation Song)":

"It's the end of Mount Pearl as we know it,

It's the end of Mount Pearl as we know it,

And I feel fine."

You're craving more after just three lines, aren't you?

Well, Great Big Steve from the topical island Telegram aims to deliver.

So, picture me wearing a long wig with an Alan Doyle-like part in the middle (draw one on your paper or screen, if you wish).

Now sing along to this surefire classic, destined for pubs, kitchen parties and an upcoming Russell Crowe film:

"Oh the night that Paddy Daly sighed is a night I'll never forget,

I called his show loaded drunk and I ain't got over it yet,

I'm glad the producer pressed the button, that seven-second delay,

Oh geez, I swore on air, and what I didn't say ..."

I know, I know, you're rocking out. And your family or co-workers are wondering what in the name of Ryan Snoddon's cat is going on.

Tell them about Great Big Steve, and then encourage them to sing ...

"Dean MacDonald, Dean MacDonald, have you seen Dwight?

Dean MacDonald, Dean MacDonald, have you seen Dwight?

Dean MacDonald, Dean MacDonald, have you seen Dwight?

You won't be leader without a fight.

Gone around the island gonna see what we hear,

Gone around the island gonna show the Liberals care,

Gone around the island won't even stop to pee,

If you see Dean MacDonald tell him I wants he."

Now, wipe that brow. Take a deep breath. Put your hands together and give 'er ...

"Hey, hey and away we go,

Doc O'Keefe riding, Doc O'Keefe riding

Hey, hey and away we go,

Riding on Doc O'Keefe."

Wicked, or wha?

So wicked you're wondering if it's too good to be true.

No worries, Dear Reader, I got a million of 'em ...

"They'll rant at Nalcor like true Newfoundlanders,

"They'll rant at Nalcor online and the phone,

Until they kills Muskrat and the project is sunkers,

And straight into gas and wind power we'll go."

OK, that's all the lyrical stylings - all tongue in cheek, people - I'm sharing, though.

The word count is getting high, and I'm holding on to the rest in case the band becomes a great big reality and we cut an album.

We'd probably title our debut, "The Hard and the Cheesy."

Steve Bartlett has the musical talent of uninstalled laminate flooring. Reach him via email at sbartlett@thetelegram.com or follow him on Twitter @SteveBartlett_