Call of the Day

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You just can’t make this stuff up

I listen to VOCM Open Line most days. During every program I am by turns amused, entertained and sometimes angered by the stuff that host Paddy Daly gets on with (which, no doubt, is exactly the outcome he intends).

This morning, I just heard a call that I had to share with you. The first minute or so was absolutely surreal and I think Daly handled it well given the circumstances. Here’s the transcript, with the host’s quotes in boldface.

Hello caller, you’re on the air.

Why do you cut me off for all the time?

Who?

You. You’re talking to me, then you go again, and then you come back.

You must be speaking of my producer because this is the first time you and I have spoke so I’m not sure what you’re talking about but I’m glad you called the program this morning. What’s on your mind?

(LONG pause)

You’re not Randy Simms?

No, I am not Randy Simms.

How come I’m not talking to Randy Simms?

I think you’re better served to call the City of Mount Pearl, their council office, and maybe they can connect you with Randy Simms. Is there anything you’d like to discuss with the listeners of Open Line? I can shut up and you can do all the talking if that’s better for you.

Forget it. You’re just like O’Keefe, too. It goes in one ear and out the other.

Sure you don’t even know who I am. Doesn’t matter, I suppose, does it?

You don’t know who I am.

You’re Sheila.

You’re not listening to me.

You haven’t said anything –

I’m after saying it, then I got cut. Said something else, then I got cut. 

Would you like to say it one more time?

(Another pause.)

I don’t know. It’s a waste of I think with ya.

Finally, the caller explains that she’s 86 years old, is on oxygen and her road is not passable so she’s basically housebound – like many other residents of St. John’s. And the call starts to go somewhere from here, making some fair points about the state of snowclearing in the city. But those first few moments were incredible and I just had to share. Like I said in the headline, you can’t make this stuff up.

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