Lorraine Michael: Hey, driver. Who am I, Miss Daisy? Step on it!
Aide: Good one, Ma'am.
LM: We need to get to this news conference on time. Can't miss this chance to stick it to Danno. The (expletive) little weasel's gonna pay for that Eastern Health outburst.
Aide: Is that the right attitude, Ma'am? I mean, we need to focus on the patients.
LM: (Expletive) the patients. What have they got to do with anything? Now hand me that bottle of Jim Beam and get back to those talking points.
Aide: Yes'm. (Phone rings.) Lorraine Michael's line - may I help you? One moment, please. It's the premier. He wants to talk to you.
LM: That snivelling little coward. He wants me to back off. Hello, Dan? What the (expletive) do you want? What? No way, chump. You've got a lot of gall, pleading with me not to go to the media. Frankly, Dan, you disappoint me. Now, I've got a newser to go to. Ciao, baby.
Yvonne Jones: Rollie, hand me that hair dye.
Roland Butler: You got it, Jonesy. What's on the agenda today?
YJ: Lobster, Rollie. We're gonna get those fishermen back to work.
RB: You think? Sounds like a tough shell to crack. Ha!
YJ: You're a laugh a minute, Rollie.
RB: I try.
YJ: We can do this, Rollie. It's just the thing that'll make my career.
RB: How so?
YJ: Just think about it. Lobster traps. Crustaceans. It's sexy.
RB: Yeah, I know what you mean.
YJ: OK, let's get crackin'.
RB: Ha! Good one, Jonesy.
YJ: I still got it.
Kathy Dunderdale: Premier, I'm beginning to have doubts about this Lower Churchill thing.
Danny Williams: Hey, Katt. Don't sweat it. I've got it covered.
KD: I mean, how are we supposed to get all those megalitres of electricity down to U.S. markets.
DW: Megawatts, Katt. Megawatts.
KD: Yeah, I know. But we can't go through Gros Morne, now that everyone knows.
DW: Yeah, those pathetic little tree-huggers put the kibosh on that. Who do they think they are? They don't own the park.
KD: But now we've got nowhere else to go.
DW: Don't worry, Katt. I have a plan. You see, we can ship the power ... (inaudible) ... and then down through Manitoba.
KF: Wow! You're a genius, Premier.
DW: Um, Rhodes Scholar. Remember?
Jerome Kennedy: So, Rossie. What are we going to do about these (expletive) nurses?
Ross Wiseman: Well, I think the nursing situation in this province is strong. We need to examine where resources can be utilized more efficiently within the health-care system, and where we can make gains in the ...
JK: For the love of God, Ross. Save the tranquilizer talk for the cameras. You're putting me in a trance here.
RW: Sorry.
JK: Frankly, I don't think those nurses have the guts to take a strike vote.
RW: Actually, they already took a strike vote.
JK: Really? Well, I'll bet the support wasn't very high.
RW: It was 87 per cent in the Eastern district alone.
JK: Really? Well, that still leaves 38 per cent who don't want a strike. That's almost one-third.
RW: Actually, that's more than a third ... wait a minute. How do you figure that?
JK: Simple math, Rossie.
RW: Look, they're threatening an overtime strike. That means they'll work regular shifts, but no overtime.
JK: A-ha! What did I tell you? They're too afraid to go on a real strike.
RW: Actually, an overtime strike would cripple the system. Eastern Health is scrambling to make sure they'll be covered.
JK: Well, there you go. We've got Eastern Health on the run. That's something, isn't it?
RW: What?
JK: We're going to win this, Rossie.
RW: (Sigh.)
Peter Jackson is The Telegram's editorial page editor. He can be contacted by e-mail at pjackson@nl.rogers.com.
Secret tapes unveiled
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Published on
June 16, 2009
- Published on July 1, 2010
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Peter Jackson
Lorraine Michael: Hey, driver. Who am I, Miss Daisy? Step on it!
Aide: Good one, Ma'am.
LM: We need to get to this news conference on time. Can't miss this chance to stick it to Danno. The (expletive) little weasel's gonna pay for that Eastern Health outburst.
Aide: Is that the right attitude, Ma'am? I mean, we need to focus on the patients.
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Comments
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- Frank
- - July 2, 2010 at 14:57:18
Good one Peter. I still think good humor is as good a medicine as laughter.
Hope you are feeling better these days.
Frank Blackwood -
- Danielle
- - July 2, 2010 at 14:56:04
HAHAHAHAHAHA
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- Jill
- - July 2, 2010 at 14:51:02
HAHAHAHHAHA! (Sigh.)
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- Funny_Stuff
- - July 2, 2010 at 14:49:20
This is really funny....lmao...I bet this really goes on...Good one Peter!
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- W
- - July 2, 2010 at 14:42:24
You are giving RW too much credit..........I bet he spends more time asking the IT guy why he can't play solitaire on a full screen window.
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- Frank
- - July 1, 2010 at 21:44:39
Good one Peter. I still think good humor is as good a medicine as laughter.
Hope you are feeling better these days.
Frank Blackwood -
- Danielle
- - July 1, 2010 at 21:42:46
HAHAHAHAHAHA
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- Jill
- - July 1, 2010 at 21:34:14
HAHAHAHHAHA! (Sigh.)
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- Funny_Stuff
- - July 1, 2010 at 21:31:14
This is really funny....lmao...I bet this really goes on...Good one Peter!
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- W
- - July 1, 2010 at 21:19:39
You are giving RW too much credit..........I bet he spends more time asking the IT guy why he can't play solitaire on a full screen window.
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