Chelsea McKinnon is going to embrace the idea of a low-key Christmas this year.
It’s the second year this Kentville, N.S. mom has done so. Last year, on Dec. 20, McKinnon had her second baby and said that Christmas was low-key as a result – as much as it could be with a newborn at home.
“It was great,” she says. “There was no need to run around or worry about Christmas dinner, and I could just enjoy the company of my little family.”
When it came to travelling during the holidays, McKinnon also noticed a big difference. Travelling, she says, is stressful and takes the fun out of the holidays. With an almost-four-year-old at home as well, she noticed a huge difference in his mood when they weren’t travelling.
This year, because of COVID-19, she’ll also keep things low-key.
“It sucks that we will miss the holiday parties and seeing friends, but once the pandemic is over and the kids are older, maybe we'll consider travelling for the holidays again,” she says.
Avonport, N.S. resident Julie MacDonald is also going to embrace the idea of a “less-crazy” season this year.
“I am hoping that this slow down will help me to really enjoy time with my family bubble and not be over-stressed with a crazy schedule and expectations,” she says.
Taryn O’Brien, also from Kentville, is looking forward to peace and quiet, puzzles, board games, Disney+, movies, hot drinks, and snuggling up with books by the fire this year.
Stress-mas?
These women are not alone. Lisa and Laurie Pinhorn, holistic family interventionists in St. John’s, N.L. and co-owners of Empowered Parents, an organization dedicated to cultivating calm, connected and compassionate environments for children and families, agree there is another side to the holiday season.
Does Christmas ever feel more like it should be called Stress-mas? Do you ever feel like you need a holiday after Christmas?
All of the preparations, expectations, running around, shopping for deals, hosting houseguests, attending big family dinners, being double-booked for parties, staying up late, and indulging in too much food and drink can take a toll on you, says Pinhorn. This all adds up and impacts your energy levels, stress levels, and mood, and your overall wellness can take a hard hit.
"We know that because of COVID-19, lots of these traditional stressors will be removed, and we think that is a good thing," says Pinhorn, who has always advocated for a slower holiday season.
“I'm not a betting gal, but I think the forced COVID-19 slow down will be an interesting process for many this holiday season."
Break traditions
This year has already changed so many things in our lives and has given us no choice in breaking old traditions and seeking alternatives, says Rhonda Gallant, a natural wellness coach and fitness facilitator with Wingspan Wholistic Wellness studio in Souris, P.E.I.
“It feels in-line with the global shift that we should each take a hard look at our own reality and what we really want to see continue in our lives and what has run its course,” she says.
With fewer obligations and a slower pace this year, families will have the gift of more time at home together to reflect on holidays past and more opportunities to appreciate things that really matter, says Gallant.
Remember, says Pinhorn, it's OK to have a slow, family-focused, low anxiety holiday.
"It will bring your family closer together and help you set the stage for a successful January," she says.
To help create a calm holiday season, Pinhorn recommends doing the following:
- Shop online to avoid crowds in the malls
- Say 'No' to some of the party and social expectations - sometimes it is better to stay at home
- Watch your kiddies for signs of anxiety and ask them what they can handle that day
- Keep your sleep, nutrition, and exercise on track
- Try to keep sugar and food colouring as low as possible
- Sleep in and spend some days in your PJs
- Play outside
- Think about all the wonderful sensory activities you can do as a family - baking, singing, go to the swimming pool, make a gingerbread house, etc.
- Slow down.... dim the lights, turn off your phone, pour some tea, and sit by the fire
Adjust expectations
It’s particularly important, says Gallant, to adjust our perceptions of the situation and practice gratitude for the blessings in your life. By evaluating and organizing your priorities, you can enjoy new traditions with less stress and more quality time in holidays to come, she says.
Having more downtime for self-care and home projects are some of the many benefits that come with a slower holiday schedule with fewer social obligations.
"This also allows us more time to spend with closer chosen circles of family, friends, and coworkers, with benefits of lower anxiety and stress levels, as these are more often just the people that you most enjoy time with," says Gallant.
Missing loved ones
It's the idea of not getting together with friends and family over the holidays that is stressful or upsetting for many people, though.
Donna Randell, from New Minas, N.S., is working on a list of sharing Christmas ideas - things they can do together as a family while apart. This might include a video chat while making cookies or decorating their trees, craft nights, or even wine Wednesday chats.
“There will be more reaching out to our extended family to share and make memories this year,” says Randell. “We need to find things to celebrate and make each other happy.”
Another benefit is that maybe more families will finally have time to volunteer or start some new traditions for your children that show the deeper meaning of the season is giving not just receiving, says Gallant.
And, this is exactly what Frieda Burger, from White Rock, N.S. is doing with her newfound time, now that so many of her meetings and events have been cancelled. She is taking the time to volunteer more and help out in the community during the holidays. She will man the Salvation Army kettle more often and send cards and greetings to people who may be alone or lonely.
Embrace the slowdown of the holiday season, says Pinhorn. And find ways to make this happen every year.
Did you know?
For those who are still looking for ways to slow down the holidays and embrace what this year will bring, Empowered Parents is hosting the 12 Days and 12 Ways of Cultivating a Calm and Connected December on their social media platforms, starting Dec. 13. Join them on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram as they share ways to say 'Yes' to restorative activities and 'No' to energy-draining events.