Top News

JANICE WELLS: Life’s little mysteries

Lonely feeder posed for a picture, but not in its usual place.
Lonely feeder posed for a picture, but not in its usual place. - Janice Wells

This is going to be a column of mysteries. One is an old mystery that I will give you the answer to, one I hope someone out there can give me the answer, and the others will never be truly solved because they involve my new laptop computer.

Was it only two weeks ago that I was moaning about the stress of having a new cellphone? Talk about a glutton for punishment.

Now I have a new laptop, bought specifically so I could write this column while in my summer house around the bay. For some reason known only to the devil, I did not get a quick course in the basics of how to use it before I left the store. I was in a hurry and I told myself it is the same model, only newer, so how different can it be?

That is the first mystery. Who was inhabiting my body that day? The second mystery is why did I not try it out before I left town to go to a no-tech zone?

I discovered the background is black and the letters are white. I can’t find the delete key, although there is a key that says delete-forward slash-Suppr. I have to write ’forward slash’ because when I try to actually make a forward slash I get this; É. That É or ités baby brother show up when I try to use punctuation the normal way. That used to happen on my desktop but I figured out how to get around it. That method does not work on this computer. I have stumbled upon how to get around some of it but not all, and I cannot figure out how to block information from online for copying and pasting into a word document.

There is no one helpful around and it is too early for a strong drink so I will struggle on and relate a mystery solved.

This one is for the guys at the legion in Grand Falls-Windsor, N.L. I have uncovered the identity of the mystery woman behind home plate at Blue Jays home games. There she is, well-coiffed, wearing a pretty scarf, enjoying a snack, game after game, season after season. She never shows any reaction to what’s going on on the field, which fascinates me no end.

When I first wrote about ‘the missus behind home plate’ last year, I googled her and found over 300,000 results. There was still no answer to the question and the Blue Jays’ head office said she did not want her name given out. Today, however, I did find it online, from a national news report, with an entirely different explanation of why she has those seats.

A woman at a spring training game in Dunedin, Fla., told me the mystery woman’s name and that she had two best-seat tickets for life to events at the Sky Dome, including concerts, by winning a contest to name said SkyDome back when it was built. Of course, it is now the Roger’s Centre but luckily the tickets were for her lifetime, not the name’s lifetime. Plus, it will always be the SkyDome to anyone around in those days.

When I first wrote about ‘the missus behind home plate’ last year, I googled her and found over 300,000 results. There was still no answer to the question and the Blue Jays’ head office said she did not want her name given out. Today, however, I did find it online, from a national news report, with an entirely different explanation of why she has those seats.

I believe the woman in Dunedin. After all, her mother knew someone who knew someone who was this woman’s neighbour’s cousin, but I will respect her wishes and not tell you her name.

Now for a mystery I need solved. Why won’t birds eat the nyger seed out of my finch feeder? They did until last year. I have cleaned the feeder, bought a new feeder, moved the feeder, replaced the seed, and bought a different brand of seed. The occasional gold or purple finch stops by and turns up its beak and goes on to another feeder. Once, I took down the other feeder, but they still snubbed the nyger seed.

I won’t be buying anymore, but I’d love to have the mystery solved.

Janice Wells offers her own unique take on life as a baby boomer, often served up with a twist of humour and a splash of gin. She lives in St. John’s, NL and can be reached at janicew@nf.sympatico.ca.


MORE FROM JANICE WELLS

Recent Stories